The Matchmaker’s 7 Rules for Modern Dating

man and woman black and white

For those who make the rules in their business life, playing by someone else’s rules in the dating world can seem stifling. Of course, if you’ve been out of the dating scene for a while, a few general guidelines might be helpful.  After all, dating is very emotional if you’re really putting yourself out there. Our Los Angeles matchmakers have compiled these dating rules to help you set up and maintain healthy standards so your emotions don’t override your common sense.

Be Charming

The rise of technology has forever changed the way people interact with each other in real life, leading to the downfall of good old-fashioned manners and common courtesy. In what feels like such a tricky dating scene, a charming, engaged date will stand out above the rest. Storytelling, light-hearted conversation, and a genuine interest in your date will have an incredibly positive impact on those early face-to-face exchanges.

Matchmaker Tip: One of the least charming things you can do is consistently check your phone in the presence of your date; so unless it’s an emergency, silence it and tuck it away!

Protect Yourself

It’s so important to use common sense when dating. It has become more and more acceptable to engage in sexual encounters early on in the relationship, causing you to potentially invest emotionally too soon. If you’re the fall-fast type, wait to invite someone home with you as long as possible. If it’s important to you to be in a committed relationship before having sex, honor those values. Protect and respect yourself.

Don’t Reveal Too Much Too Soon

There is a fine line between being secretive and revealing way too much in the early stages of dating. In the beginning, it’s safer to lean toward a brief, vague explanation of why your last relationship ended, if asked. There’s no need to bring it up unwarranted.  If you’ve been through a divorce, keep it short and sweet and don’t bog the conversation down with mean-spirited insults.

Matchmaker Tip: Before sharing deeply personal information or feedback, here are three classic questions to consider: 1) Is it true? 2) Is it necessary to share? and 3) Is it kind?

Moving On

One of the biggest questions our matchmakers receive is how long one should wait after a relationship ends to begin dating again. Though that answer varies from person to person, you really should move on as soon as possible. The best way to get over a partner or lover is to put yourself out there and start dating. Before diving into dating just one person, examine your emotional state to make sure you won’t end up in a rebound relationship, which could be devastating to both parties down the road.

Parents Should Date

Oftentimes, parents feel they shouldn’t date because their kids are too young; however, the best thing you can do for your kids in the long run is to enjoy your life. Lead by example! Don’t use your children as an excuse not to date. Getting back into the dating scene can be a little scary, but it’s totally worth it.

Matchmaker Tip: Don’t expose your children to an entourage of men/women. Your child shouldn’t meet every person you date. Protect their emotions and avoid confusion by only introducing them to partners you are serious about.

Don’t Seem too Eager

It can be very tempting at the beginning of a relationship to spend all your free time with the person who has you twitterpated, but appearing to eager can be a turn-off. Instead of blowing off that lunch date with a friend or a night out with the guys, make it a priority to go. Have a good time and if you feel like it, you can share the details with your new love interest at a later date. Maintaining your independence while also managing your relationship is a big turn-on to both men and women.

The first and most important thing you should do when dating someone new is to protect yourself. Set your own rules based on personal values and stick to them. The heart is a strong, yet fragile thing, so be cautiously optimistic and follow your gut. If you want to be sure the person you are dating is exactly who they say they are, contact Kelleher Los Angeles today. We use a unique vetting process to make sure the men and women you meet are truly top tier. Contact us today!

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